A Room at the Inn. Epilogue from A Book for the seriously stressed.

I see life as being a long journey with (what is often) a vague destination, it's can be (at times) an arduous odyssey littered with obstacles. We often perceive these as an impediment to the journey when in reality they are an imperative. I’d even say they are God sent; The strength, knowledge and wisdom we acquire when overcoming these stumbling blocks, or 'tests', are exactly what we need to make our transient goal clear and accessible.

Each problem contains its own solution; Deepak Chopra tells us that all problems contain a seed of opportunity for the creation of something new and beautiful, and every problem or problematic person becomes your teacher.

Every rock we move on that craggy road allows us a brighter view of the big picture. The more adversity we meet and overcome the clearer the goal becomes and the more our limited minds are able to understand and cope as the final destination appears before us.

At the start of the race our consciousness is too immature and weak to carry the 'trophy' that awaits us at the finish line. It is the journey that develops the 'muscle' to carry the 'metal'.

To build a big house you need a big foundation, the bigger the house the bigger the foundation. If you try to build a big house on a small or weak base the house will fall. The metaphoric 'big house' that we are talking about is at the end of the journey, the foundation is the schooling we receive, the strength we acquire and the wisdom we develop on the journey.  We can't just be given our objective because it's to big for our limited consciousness to hold.

The Inn:

On our journey we find rest spots, inns if you like, where we can rest our weary feet and take respite. These 'inns' are the 'stop gap' jobs we take whilst searching for vocation, the second best we accept until we can locate something worthier.

The problem with these inns is, they often become safe havens, hiding places, a permanent shelter from the 'stormy weather'. It is comforting to be out of the wind and rain of life, if only for a short while, but invariably we think to our selves, 'this is nice, I like it here, I think I'll stay a little bit longer. One more night won't hurt!' 

One night at the inn becomes two and two nights three. Suddenly we've been at the inn for so long it becomes less like a rest spot and more like a fixed abode.

Some of us even kid ourselves (or we let others kid us) that the inn is the end of the journey. Others still forget they were on a journey in the first place; though in the dark recesses of their minds a vague recollection keeps trying to surface.

In time the inn becomes anchored to comforts that transform it into a cage. Around the cage are bars of fear; they keep creativity in and creation out. We dare not touch the bars, or even approach them. Every time we venture to the periphery of our newly found comfort zone to view the great out side we are pushed back by fear.

The longer we stay the more comforts we attach. The bars grow thick and become impenetrable.

However, we are not alone at the inn, it is shared by internal and external allies who help us to forget our journey and act as a calming balm for the pain of losing our way.

Whilst these 'allies' do temporarily take away the pain and offer solace it is conditional. They become enemies should we ever try to leave the inn.

Internal Allies;

Our internal allies, the Defence Mechanisms, are like unconscious 'shovels' that we employ to bury our pain; we then kid ourselves that where we are is 'good enough', or 'not our fault' or 'fate', we might even convince ourselves that the inn is the destination.

External Allies;

Externally our allies are others who have also stayed too long in the inn; we take solace from them and them from us.

We quickly learn to attack anyone who tries to leave the inn, because if they penetrate the bars of fear our defenses temporarily crumble and we see reality in all its splendor. When this happens we can no longer hide from truth.

Pain is Transient;

Every time we try to leave the inn we feel pain, and we associate this pain with everything beyond the bars. We feel that it is a permanent fixture on the 'outside'. Paradoxically we associate comfort with all that is on the ‘inside’ so eventually we stop trying to leave.

But the pain is not permanent, it is transient, it only exists on the periphery of the cage and once penetrated the pain dissipates and empowerment begins. You give birth to a new life.

Our internal defenses try to protect us from reality by offering valid reasons for staying, our external allies protect themselves from the pain of being reminded that they too should be on the journey by attacking those that try to leave, and destroying the credibility of those that have left.

Comfort consolidates if it isn't regularly challenged. The longer you stay at the inn the harder it is to leave, so if you have to rest make it fleeting and don't allow to many comforts to grow around you, comforts become mile stones when you want to recommence the journey.

Where Are You Going?

Where you want to be in life is where you should be going; goals are there to be achieved not debated. Whatever it is you want from life 'make it so'.  Obstacles are their to make you strong, don't procrastinate over them or fall into the victim mentality ('Oh, poor old me, so many obstacles'). If you are getting more obstacles than most then I'd say you're lucky, it means you have a greater propensity to grow. Move the rocks out of your way and get strong and wise doing it. It is only when you lose sight of the goal that the hurdles loom large, and the opportunities suddenly become impediments.

Be grateful for every opportunity.

If you want to be a painter, or an actor, or a writer or whatever, why aren't you doing it, or at the very least why aren't you starting the journey towards it. Because it's too hard? Too many things in the way? Too many other commitments? If it was easy the world would be full of high achievers, it has to be hard, that's the apprenticeship. There is only one person stopping you from being whom you want to be, doing what you want to do. You! And that's the only person that you have to change.

Please don't use your influences or your environment as an excuse for failure.  It's not them it is you, if people are trying to stop you from living your life then they're your 'allies at the inn', they’re the hurdles that you have to overcome. If they love you enough they'll grow with you, if you want 'it' enough you'll convince them, if they don't and you can't then you'll get left behind.

Once we realise that we are the creators, that we have the ability to create, we’ll see that there is nothing we cannot achieve and that all life's problems are seeds of opportunity cocooned within the Small Wars.

Good luck with the journey. God bless.

Geoff Thompson.

Visit Geoff at his website www.geoffthompson.com